Welcome to Season 3 of According to Doyle. If you are just joining us, feel free to read the About This Project page for information about what else I’ve ranked (and am going to rank) here as well as statements about hubris and my cat. All songs here are ranked based on the guiding principle of “do I like each song more than the last song?” No science was harmed (or employed) in the creation of these lists. I welcome editing feedback because Doyle brain too fast for Doyle fingers.
30. Let’s Get Lost (featuring Neil Tennant)
Second Single from Alone (2016), Released as a single in 2017
Every time I rank songs, I run into this thing where I write about so many great songs that I run out of words that communicate “this is awesome.” I usually start the process by sorting all the singles by any particular artist into (more or less) three categories – stuff I don’t like, stuff that doesn’t stick in my head, and stuff that rocks. This was tougher than usual with The Pretenders because – out of 56 singles – I put 46 singles in the “stuff that rocks” column. So, I made two more subdivisions – stuff that I would put on a playlist and stuff that I would put on EVERY playlist. Here we are at song #30 and we’re already at the “every playlist” subdivision. I just really like The Pretenders, I reckon.
Alone is both the title of the album and the line-up of The Pretenders for this album. As with Packed! (how did I miss Packed!?), Chrissie Hynde was the sole Pretender credited on the album. She’s supported by a set of great session musicians, of course. Reading through this article, I note that this was originally going to be a solo album (Hynde released a terrific solo album titled Stockholm in 2014 which would have added three singles to this list if it were a solo record – check out “Dark Sunglasses,” “You or No One,” and “Down the Wrong Way”). I think the thing that makes Alone a Pretenders album instead of a solo album is that the sound on this one is much rawer (it was recorded live in the studio with producer Dan Auerbach of the Black Keys), while her solo albums have often leaned into a more polished sound.
OK, so what about “Let’s Get Lost?” The album version (which I can’t find at the moment) is terrific in its own right – steel guitar, great flirty vocal and that lovely “cry just a little bit” chorus. The single break out a secret weapon – guest backing vocalist Neil Tennant. Tennant often leans into his kind of detached, ironic delivery with The Pet Shop Boys and I forget sometimes that he also has a lovely completely unironic singing voice as well. His contribution raises an already great song into “pop it on Every Playlist” status. That is how I’m saying that this song is awesome.
29. A Love
Third Single from Relentless (2023), Released as a single in 2023
Part of what knocked the wind out of my single ranking sails in 2020 was the fact that I was struggling with the concept of what constitutes a single, especially in this century. I’ve kind of loosely settled on “whatever songs the band or label used to promote the band in the US, Canada and UK plus songs that ranked on the airplay charts.” But in 2020 and before, I extensively referenced discogs (which sometimes included international singles, white label singles, flexi-disks and other special releases), songs that weren’t technically by the band but were by the band (like anything Robert Smith did outside The Cure short of his time in Siouxsie and the Banshees) and the bands’ own websites (which sometimes include fan club releases, but often don’t include stuff that charted). This significantly increased the number of tracks I’d need to rank and often results in me listening to some absolutely batshit stuff (see “Crystal Japan” by David Bowie at 138).
Another part of what knocked the wind out of my sails was that many of the artists whose work I love continue to release new singles. For example, since I finished ranking Elvis Costello songs in 2019, he’s released at least 8 new singles. The first band whose singles I ranked was U2 in 2017 and since that time they’ve released about 16 singles. When I started ranking The Pretenders’ singles in 2020, there were 26 other songs that I included (Chrissie Hynde solo, collaborations with other artists, songs only released in – I don’t know – Lichtenstein maybe). Just as I published the first section of the list, they released Hate for Sale and I was like WTF. I mean, I am not expecting bands to stop releasing new music just because I’m working on these lists, but I’m expecting MYSELF to know that they’re about to release new work while I’m actively researching them. So, at any rate, that pretty much stuck a pin in this whole project for five years.
Which brings us to 2023’s Relentless, which came out just as I was thinking of starting up again and made me go “oh, nah.” However, I started listening to Relentless again in November and it made me think “you know, I really should finish that list.” And here we are at “A Love,” one of several absolute bangers composed by Chrissie Hynde and James Walbourne. I detect a hint of R.E.M. in Walbourne’s guitar work – which means a hint of early James Honeyman-Scott era Pretenders in the guitar work, so, uh, right – and I really dig that (I also totally hear R.E.M. in the final single from Relentless, coming soon). The lyrics seem to be about that fear you get when you start falling for somebody but have been burned by love a bunch of times. The vocal melody – and the backing vocals – are hooky as all get out, and that’s among the reasons that this song is awesome.
28. Money Talk
Fourth Single from Last of the Independents (1994), Released as a single in 1994
I was still DJing at KTUH at the University of Hawaii at Manoa when Last of the Independents was released. If I recall correctly, my then-girlfriend was trying to get me to quit DJing (I did) because it took me away from the apartment for a couple of hours a week. I did quit and she broke up with me a few months later. I probably should have tried to go back, but whoa that was a rough break up.
ANYHOW, the point I’m working towards is that I was not really in a great place while DJing to really dive into an album (nor did I have any extra cash at that time to buy records), so the only track I really played a bunch from this one was “Night in My Veins” (coming soon). I was also disconnected enough from mainstream music that I didn’t even know that this record’s “I’ll Stand by You” (also coming soon) became a big hit until I heard it on an adult contemporary station in the late 90’s.
I would have played the hell out of “Money Talk” on the air if I’d taken the time to listen to this record before I quit DJing. It is exactly the kind of rocker I was loving at the time and the note Hyndehits when she sings “I’m begging at the feet of the devil” sends me into a tizzy. That’s a medical condition, you know. The lyrics read like they’re about a prostitute negotiating with a John, which might make this something of a thematic descendant of “Kid” (coming up). It absolutely touches on themes of resilience – how women do what they have to do to survive for their children and themselves. Anyhow, that’s why THIS song is awesome.
27. Love’s a Mystery
Second Single from Break up the Concrete (2008), Released as a single in 2008
The first line in the lyrics of “Love’s a Mystery” is a kind of name drop of The Pretenders’ classic “Lovers of Today” (Not a single). The latter is an awesome song and it’s amazing to realize that wasn’t a single from their first album. In fact, there’s several tracks from Pretenders that would be easily among my top 20 picks if they had been singles – including “The Phone Call,” “Tattooed Love Boys,” “The Wait” (oh my God, “The Wait!” so good) and of course the greatest of all their songs “Mystery Achievement.” I’m listing all these songs while discussing a track from the album Break up the Concrete in order to torment my future self when I try to figure out when I discussed them.
“Love’s a Mystery” opens with a fabulous bit of pedal steel guitar by then-Pretender Eric Haywood to perhaps be considered an alt-country song. I’d certainly put it on my “Uncle Tupelo and Friends” playlist. The lyrics are about knowing you shouldn’t do something (falling in love) but doing it anyways. Hynde makes a point to compare falling in love to being a repeat offender criminal, which is among the reasons this song is awesome.
26. Popstar
Second Single from ¡Viva El Amor! (1999), Released as a single in 1999
1999 was a weird year for music. Well, at least for me. I don’t recall there really being a local radio station that played the kind of music I liked (sometimes KTUH, but as with most college stations, you had to get lucky and tune it at just the right time), MTV’s rock playlist was sort of all Nu-Metal, and if I wanted exposure to new music, I had to go to Borders or Tower Records and stand at the listening station (while wearing those same headphones that every other customer had worn – the things we did pre-pandemic!). It was also a year where boy bands and teen pop princesses were still dominating the charts – indeed, it was arguably the zenith of the turn of the century bubblegum pop era.
So, it’s not necessarily surprising that Hynde would critique the era with “Popstar” – a song aimed, in my opinion, more at the industry people who crafted the clean pop of the 90’s than necessarily at the performers. She frames is as being aimed at her former boyfriend, whose new girlfriend wants to be the titular popstar and, thus, it deliberately comes across as a jealous ex dissing the man’s poor taste than directly dissing the new girlfriend. Anyhow, I hear it more critiquing the image-over-art attitude of the 90’s music industry than the young women involved in it. The song is catchy as all hell – pop hooks out the wazoo (that’s an industry term). Finally, the legendary New York Dolls lead singer David Johansen (maybe best known in pop culture as Buster Pointdexter) sings backing vocals. That’s why this song is awesome (I’m going to abandon this conceit for the rest of these entries but just assume they’re all awesome too).
25. The Buzz
First Single from Hate for Sale (2020), Released as a single in 2020
Hate for Sale is a straight up great rock album featuring a Pretenders line up of Hynde, Chambers, guitarist and album co-writer James Walbourne and bassist-without-a-wikipedia-entry Nick Wilkinson (he is referenced at List of the Pretenders band members). I had been listening to a whole bunch of Pretenders tracks in 2020 (because, as I mentioned, I had been trying to create this list) and was genuinely blown away by the album when it came out (there are five songs from Hate for Sale on my list and this is the second lowest ranked). “The Buzz” is a fantastic pop/rock song comparing chasing love to chasing a high. Yes, it’s not the first time this idea has been explored, but it might as well be when you hear Hynde’s voice caress the line “you see how a shot of love makes you feel?” Yes, yes, it’s catchy as all hell too even without her vocal line, but wow what a vocal line. The way she interprets songs both evokes my admiration as a fellow vocalist but also goes a long way to explain my ongoing celebrity crush on her. That’s the sound of desire brewed down to espresso.
24. Human
Second Single from ¡Viva El Amor! (1999), Released as a single in 1999
Cover of the song “Human on the Inside” originally performed by The Divinyls (1996)
The Divinyls’ original version of “Human” (see above) is, in my opinion, superior to The Pretenders’ cover (and The Pretenders’ cover kicks ass). Divinyls lead singer Chrissy Amphlett was the kind of singer who brought a slightly dangerous edge to everything she sang and, thus, their version of the song sounds just a little bit sinister to me (in the best possible way). It’s an absolutely fabulous song for Chrissie Hynde’s voice, too, and The Pretenders cover is pop bliss (with a little rock edge). “Human on the Inside” deserved a bigger audience and Hynde and The Pretenders made that possible, so huge props to them for making this great tune a big hit. The Divinyls deserved even more success than they had and Amphlett died way too young.
I want to mention that The Pretender’s version includes backing vocals by one of my favorite singer-songwriters, Jules Shear.
23. Didn’t Want to Be This Lonely
Fourth Single from Hate for Sale (2020), Released as a single in 2020
I love the video for this song. One of The Pretender’s best.
“Didn’t Want to Be This Lonely” is a catchy, rollicking rock tune about a woman who ends a bad relationship but finds that – while she’s glad to be done with him – she’s much lonelier than she anticipated. At the risk of writing way less about this song than some of the others on this list, this song just straight up kicks ass.
22. The Adulteress
Fourth Single from Pretenders II (1981), Released as a single in 1981
Please take a moment to watch this 1981 performance by the original line-up of The Pretenders on the short-lived Fridays tv series (an attempt by ABC to replicate the success of Saturday Night Live). There is an amazing band at the peak of their game shortly before everything imploded. While I am always particularly impressed by guitarist James Honeyman-Scott (and wow is this song an amazing showcase for his songwriting), the whole band is playing in top form. “The Adulteress” charted in the United States as an “airplay” track – which is to say it wasn’t necessarily released as a 45rpm single, but rock stations played the hell out of it. The first time I made this list, I ranked it in the bottom five, but revisiting it this time around (especially while paying attention to the guitar work) led me to move it way up the list. I’m not convinced I’ve ranked it as highly as it deserves, but I’m feeling pretty good about where I’ve placed the next 21 songs, so I’ll live with it.
21. Time the Avenger
Fifth Single from Learning to Crawl (1984), Released as a single in 1984
Between vinyl singles and songs that got a ton of Mainstream Rock airplay, there are more songs from Learning to Crawl that are on this list than not. There was kind of a decade or so where certain hit albums produced half a dozen singles – we kind of experience that in the digital age when a new album by somebody like Taylor Swift is released and every single song on it charts (no singles required). Back in the ancient days of my youth, conscious decisions had to be coordinated between record company A&R departments, radio stations, and fans. Fans were rarely enough – I think of The Romantics and how their all-time great song was “What I Like About You,” but that didn’t get super popular until after their record company stopped promoting it. So instead, they went to town promoting their next album and “Talking in Your Sleep” and “One in a Million” both became hits – deserved, but I bet more people know “What I Like About You” to this day.
“Time the Avengers” is a chugging rock and roll tune about a married man who is either planning on cheating with a beautiful woman or has already done so (he’s standing at the train station with a brief case that has aftershave and underwear in it). I don’t know quite how to describe it, but one of the hallmarks of a certain kind of Pretenders song to me is a kind of stop-start thing coupled with an almost sprechensang delivery by Hynde. “Time The Avenger” scratches that itch. Fun Fact! The music video for The Pretenders’ hit “Don’t Get Me Wrong” was a tribute to the British espionage TV series, The Avengers.
Coming Soon: At least three songs that you’ll insist should have been in the top ten.
The Pretender’s Singles Ranked – 51-55 – 41-50 – 31-40 – 21-30 – 11-20 – 1-10